Losing Her
by TheGecko99
Summary: Mamoru's dreams of Usagi's death drove him to leave Japan all together- for good. But when he receives an early morning call from his best friend, Mamoru is left reeling: Usagi is in a coma. What happened after Mamoru's sudden depature, six months previous? Will Usagi be the same when (or if) she wakes up?
1. The Early Morning Call

**A.N**. _This fix is set during the R season break up, however, I have made all the characters older (Usagi 18 and Mamoru 21) simply because I think it makes more sense for my story. I'm not strictly following manga or anime canon so please take that into consideration when reading ^_^ This is my first fanfic for Sailor Moon and, indeed, in general so please R&R, all criticism welcome._

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN SAILOR MOON! It belongs to Naoko Takeuchi and the respective distributors.**

**However I do own this story so please don't copy or claim, any part of my writing without permission.**

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**_Losing Her_**

_~Chapter 1: The Early Morning Call~_

It was just past 2 am when the serene morning air was rent by the shrill crying of a mobile phone. Rudely awoken, the sole inhabitant of the two-bedroom, luxury apartment, drew the sheets closer and tried in vain to ignore the irritatingly cheerful ringtone. However, when it became apparent that the noise was not going away, he begrudgingly stumbled from the warmth of the double bed and out of the room. Fumbling his way through the dark -it was _much_ too early for his brain to be functioning properly enough to turn on a light- he managed to string together enough coherent thought to not only find, his phone, but also to curse profusely at the caller ID.

"Dammit Motoki! I don't know what time it is for you, but here it's past two in the morning! Couldn't you wait until later?"

"Mamoru I'm sorry, but-" but Mamoru cut him off. Irritation, fuelled by lack of sleep, made Mamoru determined to pay out on his best friend.

"Don't aplogise now! You should have thought of that before you called! I only just managed to dose off after those damn nightmares stopped."

"Look man, I sorry, but-"

"I have classes and work today you know! Not all of us can flirt all day with customers."

"Hey!" Motoki was getting frustrated.

"Now, if you'll excuse me-"

"Mamoru, _Shut up_!" Motoki yelled through the phone.

"Huh?" Mamoru was wide awake now and slightly dazed. He didn't quite understand what had just happened. Motoki never yelled, not even that one time Usagi had tipped her chocolate milkshake over the expensive new game machine at the arcade. Whatever he was calling for must be important. Now that Mamoru thought about it, Motoki never called him any more, not after he had left so abruptly. He found himself missing the counsel of his best friend and the sound of his voice reminded Mamoru painfully, of another voice that he longed to hear again. However, he quickly banished these thoughts; he had come too far to be homesick now. Motoki interrupted Mamoru's musings.

"Well, now that I have your attention, the reason I called," Motoki proceeded in a gentle tone, he knew that, while Mamoru may deny it, he still has feelings for a certain blonde. "Usagi is in trouble. She needs you."

"Why should I care?" Mamoru strained to make his tone indifferent but his stomach was doing flips.

"Because you love her and you know it. How long are you going to keep up this charade? When are you coming home?"

Mamoru sighed, "I've already told you, I'm not coming back."

"It's been six months!"

"And I'm on a one year scholarship, with a guaranteed job with one of my professors after graduation."

"I don't give a damn about your fancy Harvard education!" The arcade manger was yelling again. "There is a girl here, in Tokyo, who loves you more than life itself! To the point of not eating and sleeping to try and improve herself for you!"

"What?" He whispered. Mamoru had never imagined Usagi would change herself for him. He wasn't worthy of her in the first place! What surprised him even more was that she hadn't moved on and found someone else. It made his heart leapt at the thought that his Usako wasn't in the embrace of another man but he quickly reminded himself that the whole reason he was in America, was to save her life. "I told her to move on."

"You asshole! You broke Usagi's heart when you broke up with her, then you avoid and throw insults at her for a month, and finally you up and leave. Completely out of the blue, no warning, and don't contact any of us for six months! How could she move on?! You know she blames herself for you leaving?"

"So what?!" Mamoru found himself yelling into the receiver now too. "You don't know anything Motoki! You know nothing!" Mamoru was angry, but not with his friend. He was angry with himself because he knew what Motoki said was true; he was an asshole. He had wounded and left behind the best thing that had ever happened to him and the

thought of his Usako in pain -at his hand, no less- made him want to be violently ill.

"Well neither do you! She's in a coma, Mamoru, a bloody coma! She collapsed an hour ago on the way to the arcade after school and hit her head on the pavement!"

Mamoru almost passed out over his kitchen bench.

"Is she ok?" Mamoru asked vacantly.

"Did you even hear what I said? She's in a _coma_, Mamoru!" Motoki was still forceful but his tone was softer. "Usagi needs you, please come home. She hasn't been the same since you left."

Mamoru began to summon the strength to tell Motoki that he wasn't coming home just because some girl thought she needed him, when his friend delivered the final blow.

"We're losing her."

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**So what did you think? Thanks for reading! Please review so that I can start work on the next two chapters. **

**~TheGecko99**


	2. Dreams and Decisions

**A.N.** _Thank you all so much for your reviews and favourites! I'm so glad you're enjoying the story so far :) I will endeavor to update as much as possible but for now sit back and enjoy the latest installment. Oh and just so you know in my story, Motoki knows everyone's Senshi identities as well as Tuxedo Mask's (I know that's not what he's called in the Japanese version but I like this better ^_^) _

_EDIT: sorry i don't know what happened with my last update, it appears the document was cut in half for some reason :/ i have now posted the full chapter with a few edits. Enjoy!_

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN SAILOR MOON! It belongs to Naoko Takeuchi and the respective distributors.**

**However, I do own this story so please don't copy or claim, any part of my writing without my permission.**

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**Losing Her**

_~Chapter 2: Dreams and Decisions~_

"What?" Mamoru was wilting inside; every wall he had built over the past six months came crashing down around him. The deafening noise only drowned by that of his thumping heart.

"Do I have to spell it out for you? She's dying, man."

"No."

"Her body is frail and weakened from severe anemia and anorexia. Not even the Silver Crystal can keep up! The fall was just the final blow."

"No! It's not true!" His voice came out strangled. Mamoru was in denial. She couldn't be dying, not like this! This was Usagi! The girl who would eat anything and everything that was put in front of her! How had her so called 'friends' let this slip past them? You left her, so what would you know? This is your fault! The little voice in the back of his head was niggling away at his composure.

"It is! We need you here! Usagi needs you here! You've got to come back!" Motoki was getting desperate, what he hadn't told Mamoru, was that Usagi was also having nightmares but hers -unlike his- were far more...real.

"I-I just don't know what I could do." Mamoru replied weakly. Usako was on the other side of the world!

"Are you stupid?"

"What?"

"You're Tuxedo Mask! A superhero! The one Usagi loves. If you won't save her no-one else can." Motoki was getting frustrated, what was it going to take to get this through his thick skull?

"How long does she have?"

"The doctors think two weeks at best. Now, get your ass back, or so help me I will come get you myself!"

"I'll be on the next flight to Tokyo." With that Mamoru hung up, not waiting for a reply. He hadn't noticed that he had unconsciously moved to the coffee machine. Sighing, he brewed a cup and drowned the pick-me-up before running to his room and throwing clothes haphazardly into a suitcase. He didn't have much time, Usako was slipping away and he would be damned if sat around and waited for death to take her on its black wings. Damn those miserable dreams! He thought. Their dreadful, nightly premonitions had plagued him for six months and now they were coming true.

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_Sailor Moon screamed as she watched her friends fall around her, their heads rolling to the ground beside their limp forms. Tuxedo Mask ran to the fallen Chibiusa and cradled her in his arms, not noticing the advancing youma. Sailor Moon tried to scream but no sound would escape her lips, she tried to attack but she found not matter how far she would run, she couldn't get close. She could only watch and cry as her love's head tumbled and the youma advanced on her. She watched in terror as the monster lifted its axe and felt a searing pain in her neck before all went black._

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In a small hospital room, lay a sleeping angel. Her golden hair splayed over the pillows and blankets in a shining halo, framing her thin heart-shaped face and frail body. Her face was the picture of innocence and supreme beauty, the serene expression she wore, masking the inner turmoil. Beside her bed was a dark and mysterious, raven-haired beauty, sitting vigil over her princess.

Rei wept as a fresh laceration appeared on Usagi's body; this time, her neck.

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**So, end of chapter 2! What did you think? Please R&R, I shall endeavor to have chapter 3 up ASAP!**

**~TheGecko99**


	3. The End of Us, The Beginning of the End

**A.N. **_Hey readers! sorry its taken so long to get this chapter up :/ i really wanted this to be a long chapter so i put some extra time in but it still isnt what i wanted (T_T). Oh well, in this chapter we are looking into the past (hence the italics) so please enjoy! From now on chapters will be a mix of past, present and dreams so enjoy this while you can. i make poor Mamoru look so bad this chapter but i had too, sorry! As always, enjoy and please R&R!_

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN SAILOR MOON! It belongs to Naoko Takeuchi and the respective distributors.**

**However, I do own this story so please don't copy or claim, any part of my writing without my permission.**

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**Losing Her**

_~Chapter 3: The End of Us, The Beginning of the End~_

_**Seven Months Previous: December 1st...**_

_"Come on Mamo-chan! Hurry up!" Usagi stopped mid run to spin on her heel and flash a blinding smile at Mamoru. But, before he could catch up, she was off again, laughing and yelling at him to hurry up. _

_"Hey!" Mamoru cracked a smile and ran after her; determined to treasure every moment he had before he had to do the unavoidable and unthinkable._

_He eventually caught up to Usagi. She had stopped to stand in the sand and stare at the moon rising over the ocean, the moonlight giving her an ethereal shine that caused Mamoru to draw breath. Was he really going to give away the angel that had fallen into his midst? Could he do it? Mamoru wrapped his arms around Usagi's small waist, holding her close and relishing the calm he felt in her presence. For awhile, he even considered not going through with this plan. _No, I have to do this. The thought of a world without her isn't one worth contemplating_. _

_Usagi leaned back into his strong chest and a little sigh of satisfaction escaped her lips. _This is perfect_, she thought. The love of her life holding and shielding her from chill night air; the crescent moon shining and warm, like a precious gem on the horizon before them, and gentle waves lapping at their feet. She wished the moment would never end. _

_The couple stood for a while, enjoying each other's embrace. Mamoru hadn't felt this calm since before the nightmares. Those miserable visions of death that haunted him every night showing him new ways that his possessed body would kill Usako, while he was helpless to do anything but watch. The thoughts of the nightmares reminded Mamoru of what he had to do._

_Usagi felt Mamoru pull away. She frowned at the sudden loss of warmth. She turned to face him and was confused at the pained expression he wore; he wouldn't meet her eyes. She reached a hand out to touch his cheek and gently lifted his head to look at her._

_"Mamo-chan?" _

_Mamoru grabbed Usagi's hand and pulled it away. It was now or never. "Don't, Usagi. It's over."_

_"What are you talking about?" Her blue eyes were glazing over and stared straight into his soul. "What's over?" _

_"We are, Usagi." She creased her brows in confusion and again lifted a hand to turn his head to look at her. If this was some kind of joke, he would pay dearly for it. But when their eyes locked Usagi was scared at what she saw- he was serious. There was no glint of mirth, just cold stone that matched the night sky above them perfectly._

_"I-I don't think I understand. Mamo-chan, what are you talking about?" Usagi was on the verge of tears._

_Mamoru pretended to sigh in frustration, his heart breaking at the look on her face but he needed her to hate him, to stay far away from him. Mamoru wouldn't be responsible for Usako dying because of his selfishness. _

_"Usagi, how thick can you be? I'm breaking up with you!"_

_"I still don't understand! You love me-" Usagi was shocked and she felt hot tears spill down her rosy cheeks._

_"That's just it, I don't. I thought I did once, but not anymore." _

_"But what about Serenity and Endymion? The Silver Millennium? We are destined for each other!"_

_"Maybe our past selves were but we are not. This a new life and I'm not going to let the past dictate my future; much less who I have to love." His heart broke a little, every time a tear fell from her eyes. He longed to dry them with his lips and tell her that he was lying, but it was too late now. _

_"What about tonight? The fair? The restaurant?" Usagi clutched her heart, choking the words out between tears. "The kiss?" She whispered. "What did that mean?" _

_"It didn't mean anything. It was just for old times sake."_

_Usagi couldn't believe what she was hearing. She didn't _want _to believe it! "Did it ever mean anything? The dates, the kisses, Sailor Moon, Tuxedo Mask...the hotel. Did any of it matter to you?"_

_"No." _Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes! _His mind screamed. _

_Usagi couldn't take it. She collapsed into the gritty sand, sobbing as her world tipped and turned an ugly shade of grey. _

_"Was it something I did?" Mamoru couldn't believe she was blaming herself. "I know I'm not the perfect girlfriend. I can be a bit clingy, I eat a lot and I can be so dreadful to poor Chibiusa. My grades are failing and I'm a pathetic champion of justice. I'm such a jealous, selfish person!" Mamoru wanted to scream that she was wrong. "But i always thought that it didn't matter to you. I would have changed everything if you had said the word." _But I never wanted you to change! _Usagi chuckled sadly, "Now that I think about it, it was so obvious that you would break up with me eventually." Her sobbing, which had briefly subsided, started anew._

_"Mamo-chan?" Usagi asked quietly_

_"What?" His voice was cold._

_"Is there someone else?" Usagi looked up at him, her watery eyes pleading. Then, even quieter, she said, "Is it Rei?" Mamoru was momentarily stunned. The thought of spending life with anyone but her was wrong. _

_"Who I see is none of your concern. Goodnight Usagi." Closing his eyes to her obvious pain, Mamoru turned around and began walking away. Usagi watched him. His broad shoulders and beautiful black hair engraved into her blurred vision, as he disappeared. Usagi, felt a tangible pain in her heart. It ripped and burned, bringing more tears to her eyes. She had lost her other half- again. _

_For what felt like an eternity to Usagi, she sat on the beach, heart dead in her chest. The once warm moonlight now seemed cold and distant._

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**I hope this chapter was satisfactory ;p I tried to make it as long as could. Hopefully more coming very soon! Until then please R&R! I love to hear what you think :)**

**~TheGecko99 **


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